Cochlear Implant

With Questamation, the Toronto-based duo USS (the name stands for Ubiquitous Synergy Seeker; no, I am not making that up) proudly joins the world of uninteresting, unbearable, and ultimately disposable radio-friendly garbage. USS’s MySpace page describes their sound as “Nirvana unplugged at a science centre rave with DJ Premier. Bob Marley in a lab coat. Chuck D and Flavor Flav at a motivational seminar. A campfire afterparty.” I have no problem with a band trying to eclecticize its sound, but this is really too much. (Hey, if they can make “Questamation” a word, why can’t I make up eclecticize?) But their flashy attempts at sounding diverse and unique come off merely as generic and forgettable. And don’t get me started on the regrettable songwriting: on “Stationery Robbery,” when a thief laughs about how he “stole your pen, so you can’t ever write again,” it’s amusing only as an apologetic explanation for why their lyrics are so dreadful. The badness of this album leaves me with a Questamation of my own: why will it make USS even more popular than before?

CURTIS WRIGHT